Pandemic in NYC: #5

I saw on twitter the other day “if your job requires an appreciation week you probably aren’t getting paid enough.”  It’s definitely true.  It was just a nurse appreciation week.  I don’t know if most nurses felt appreciated or felt any difference during that week.  I’m sure they have much more pressing and crucial things to think about than a vague holiday that barely exists.  It’s like the customers that always tell my cashier co-workers and me about the people who make the noise for the frontline workers at 7pm.  They always tell us to thank you for what we do and they ask if we hear the ruckus at that time.  I never have though because I’ve always been… at my register working.  This country is very much about the talk and flimsy gestures in terms of “appreciation” instead of shit that would make us feel appreciated like livable wages.  The people who keep everyone eating and alive and society as close to normal as possible are the ones who are suffering the gravest effects of this pandemic.  The ones who are dying are the ones who had no choice to go to work because their job put profits first and didn’t shut down or the ones who couldn’t miss a days work because they had to make sure they had rent and food for their family.

Speaking of cutesy but flimsy appreciation…

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Pandemic in NYC: #4

This is a picture of me finally with my hair down at the end of a long workday.  I work at a Grocery store in manhattan.  These are our dingey lockers where we keep our pens (they get stolen if we leave them on our registers) and our sad little lunches.  You can see my seltzer hanging from my bag.  I like this picture cause my eyelashes look as dramatic as I feel and because the angry skeleton represents how I feel about this new job that I’m working for minimum wage.  I feel angry and dead. lol cheers!

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Pandemic in NYC: #3

This is a very basic photo of the subway and a poster advertising the democratic primary.  This was a little sad for me to see as New York’s Democratic primary was canceled due to the virus.  I was planning on voting for Bernie Sander’s in the NYC primary and he was going to still be on the ballot even though he had suspended his campaign.  I was going to still give him my vote (probably for the last time).

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Pandemic in NYC: #2

Yesterday my roommate and I suited up in masks and took a trip to Coney Island.  We made sure to be careful and social distance the whole way.  We took a car there and back and were more than 20 feet away from anyone else as we basked in the sun, feet drifting around in the sand.  It was so replenishing for my soul.  I felt overflowing and happy when I was there. Each minute I lay in the sand with the blue sky opened up above me I feel the weariness leak out of me.  We got stuck in traffic a bit on our way home but it was ok because I was sun tired, grateful and I got to see this dog next to us in traffic.

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Pandemic in NYC: 1st photo

Since I’m one of the people who has to leave her house every day during this virus, I thought I’d try and document it.  I feel very rare walking the streets of NYC during this time and a lot of times I’m the only one.  When I get out of work at 10:15 pm after working the closing shift at the grocery store it barely matters if I walk on the street or the side walks.  There’s no body out.  I’m gonna do a little photo essay where I post one photo a day that encapsulates my experience being out and about during the pandemic.

This is a pic from the closest bodega to my subway station.  I needed to buy some milk for my coffee and as a perk got to meet this cat.

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1st day in Paris (+ self esteem issues!)

I’ve been to Paris before on a French Club trip where we got laughed at by all our french peers for trying to say some French words.  It was an unforgettable trip but mainly cause it was awkward and I was mostly friendless.  But also cause I saw Elton John and the Arctic Monkeys perform and ate really well.  Now I’m an assistant/wedding planner type thing and I still don’t know my place in the world or usually in the room but I’ve gotten myself to Paris and I’m getting paid for it so I guess that’s a win.

The wedding we’re working is much more than a wedding.  We are going to be in Paris for 6 days and there are 4 events (dinner parties mostly) and when we’re done here we go to level two, Antigua where we are going to do another 4 events.  It’s a lot and I’m very awkward and weirdly shy and nervous and I feel very incompetent.  I get really weird around people who are way way many millions richer than me and I almost forget how to be myself.  It’s not cute and I’ve tried to be more of a conversationalist and less down on myself during these work trips but I don’t think I’ve made any progress.  The ven diagram middle of things I have in common with these people is such a small sliver and I find it hard to talk to them.  I’m at least 10 years younger than everyone and I’ve didn’t go to college and this is not my career like it is theirs.  I’m trying to breathe and focus on the work at hand and try and make it out alive.  My boss is one of the most amazing and intelligent and capable people I’ve ever met so it’s really impressive to watch her work.  But for me and all my issues, this is a very stressful trip.  I hope to learn from her and be like her in my work life.

I think Paris is so beautiful (don’t we all) and it has this sort of airiness that New York doesn’t have.  Maybe my favorite thing about it here is that there are balconies everywhere and having a balcony has always been one of my dreams. There’s breathtaking architecture around every turn. This city clearly lends its self to dreams, especially dreams of grandeur.  It’s definitely expensive; the french onion soups we ate for lunch at a place that had a diner-y feel were 15 euro each and our cappuccinos were 8.  But in better weather, I would love nothing more than to wander around the city with my novio and have a picnic (i.e some bread, cheese and wine and us scattered on a blanket)

previously mentioned cappuccino & a very fancy hotel

being annoying at breakfast via wearing sunglasses inside

My favorite place to eat or even be in Woodstock, NY (my hometown) is Maria’s Bazaar.  Maria, the lovely Italian woman who started it and filled it with love and delicious food recently retired and sold it to someone else who now redecorated it with booths (good!) and decided to start serving very limp pizza (very bad!).  Needless to say, we miss her dearly but as loyal customers and people who grew up here, we still love it.  It actually is cozier and has a kind of diner feel now but the food quality has suffered.

When I went upstate we went for breakfast with my sister Frida, and friend’s Gracie and Tiana.  Gracie grew up here as well as she has a summer home here and would come up every summer.  We met at summer camp.

Oh and! Here’s me forcing my friends to take pictures of me cause I had never worn a wrap dress before and I was feeling myself in my new Audrey Hepburn inspired sunglasses.  Also a selfie of me with my very chic little sister!